CSI, Playground Edition

Well, why not?  CSI has about eleventy-billion versions already, no?

The other day I spotted a few girls at the top of our sledding hill, which means nothing to you but basically it's about as far away as they are allowed to be and still be within my line of sight.  So there were about 3 girls at the far peak of the hill............with their backs to us...............staring..........at...............something.

It caught our attention, but I decided that as long as we still had a visual on them, all was good.  Besides, who wants to hike all the way over there unnecessarily and risk breaking a sweat, right?

All of a sudden the group breaks their 'huddle' and one of them sprints towards me yelling, 'There's a dead body!.........There's a dead body! (see those dots in between the 2 phrases?  That's when I began sprinting towards the girl, half panicking in my head and half wondering what in the world they could be mistaking for a DEAD.BODY!

GIRL: There's a dead body!

(we're running together now towards the hill while talking)

ME:  What kind of body? (I hated the way that sounded as soon as it came out of my mouth, but I had to ask).  Then I auto-corrected:  Was it a rabbit body?  (yes we've found those...or at least parts of them before).

GIRL:  No, a person..........I think..........I'm not sure...........well Susie said......

At this time TWO things happen:

1) We arrive at the scene of the 'crime'
2) Her story begins to seriously deteriorate.

ME:  Okay where is 'it' (refraining from mentioning body again)

GIRL:  Well see that orange leaf?  Susie said that the thing RIGHT under the leaf looks like it 'might' look like a body...........uhmmmm.........or maybe it just looks like a rock..........she couldn't really be sure.

ME: Staring at her in disbelief for A) causing such a panic in the first place and B) making me break a sweat!

So, those were the two choices?  Either a rock?  or a dead body?!?!?!?  I glance at the precise orange leaf and directly under it is a .....................ROCK!   Just a plain old ordinary rock (which in 3rd grade speak apparently also translates to dead body).

I told the girl to please not start rumors like this again and to tell every SINGLE person who talked about the dead body that it was............in fact............ just ............a ..............rock.

By now, the bell has rung and we need to break another sweat hurry towards the rest of the group, where I hear all sorts of buzzing out of little mouths. 'Did you hear?'..... 'under the leaf?'.........'Behind the hill?'............ 'Dead Body?!!' (by this time we've reached the teachers) and they are all staring blankly at me as I am shouting out to the entire 3rd grade. 'THERE IS NO DEAD BODY ON THE HILL!!!' I look at them and just burst out laughing and say 'Don't ask'